An enabler plays the most quintessential role in keeping the addict stay addict. Drug addiction is one of the biggest problems the world is facing nowadays. According to the United Nations world drug report released by the United Nations office on drug and Crime, In 2019, more than 35 million people worldwide suffer from drug use disorder. This report’s alarming aspect is that only one out of seven drug dependence receive the proper treatment. Production of drugs keeps on increasing every year.
For example, cocaine production increased to a record high of 1976 tons in 2017, 25 percent more than the previous year. Cannabis is the most widely used drug worldwide, being used by 188 million people in 2017. This is a sophisticated guide about the role of an enabler, after reading the whole guide you’d be able to identify the person who is playing the role of an enabler and will know how to cop against such a role.
A man with good intentions does not end up doing well all the time. Imagine serving a stray dog with food, and that food turns out to be expired, and you find that dog lying dead in the street the next day. Similarly, it has been well said that the road to hell and the path of addiction, most of the time, are paved by good intentions.
The family of an addicted person suffers a lot from his addiction, and ultimately they have to make some decisions.
The decision includes whether they will let him continue with that addiction or whether they will stop him, if they let him continue they are playing the role of an enabler collectively. Simultaneously, an enabler does not know the impacts of habit, so an enabler unintentionally and often ignorantly let the addict continue with that addiction. The repercussions were sadly do-follow.
The term coined to describe the good and lovingly intentional individual is an enabler. An enabler plays the most quintessential role in keeping the addict stay addict. An enabler helps the addict meet the daily life needs, but on a broader picture, he or she is responsible for why the addict cannot meet those needs by himself at first. Whenever a man perpetrates something wrong, then he does face something wrong and faces terrible consequences. This dissuades him from committing the same mistake again.
An addicted person, in most cases, will not be able to pay his rent or buy groceries for himself. If there will be no one to help him in this case, then the conscience voice will force him to stop spending on drugs and start spending on something important. If the police jail an addicted person for doing drugs and there exists no one with good intentions to bail him out, then the next time, he will surely think twice before doing what he should not be doing.
So an enabler is the one that serves as a buffer between the addicted person and the negative result of his wrongdoings. When he is not subjected to face the consequences of his conspicuous actions, then he will, in no case, stop from doing what he should not be. That good intentional help will help him in that time but will only act as a slow poison in the longer run.
Signs of Enabling Behavior
The individual who is called an enabler does recognize himself as such from the very beginning. An enabler even keeps on persuading the addicted person to undergo professional medical treatment. Still, in the meantime, an enabler forget that he is the one who is the hurdle between the addicted person and the treatment.
Some of the behaviors related to an enabler that are deemed as enabling include:
- An enabler pays bills for the addicted person when he cannot bear them by himself. It is a conscious fact that an addict will spend most of his money on fulfilling his desire for the drug, and in all, almost all cases, the drug addict cannot manage the money as no one will offer him a job. And if he had an appointment in the first place, he will ultimately lose it due to the mental conditions resulting from the drug usage. He will also spend all his money on that drug.
- Most people don’t give any sort of living space to the addicts. This is mainly because of two reasons. One being the addict will spoil the environment of a given place. Secondly, he will just not be able to pay the rent. An enabler proves to be helpful in this regard by offering him a place to live.
- An average person is good at doing his household chores, so he stays focused on maintaining his living place. When a person indulges in drug intake, then he gives most of his time to the drugs, and the effect of that drug stays for quite some time. So an addict will not be able to maintain his house. There is when an enabler comes in. An enabler is the one who retains his place of living. He cooks for him, cleans his house for him, and also pays his phone bills. All this provides the drug addict with more time to focus on maintaining his addiction as he has got an enabler to do everything for him.
- From where does the addict get the money to buy all those expensive drugs? There is always someone, someone with good intentions, to give him the money. This is an enabling behaviour.
- Addicts under the influence of drugs many a time, commit illegal actions. These illicit actions, in turn, are dealt with strictly by law enforcement agencies. Enabling behaviour includes getting bail for the addict and saving him from facing the consequences that resulted just because of the hangover he had due to the drug’s overuse. This results in the poisoning of the chalice even more. Not accepting to follow the promised consequences of his illegal behaviours also is a sign of an enabler.
An enabler does not take the addiction of his or her loved ones seriously. He or she keeps on denying, ignorantly, any consequences that can result from the excessive usage of the drug. An enabler treats the addicted loved one as his or her kid. They forgive their small mistakes and try to be there for them in every situation they do for their children. This unnecessary care spoils the child even more. An enabler gives chances to the loved ones to get better. When one event fails, he or she offers another and then one more. These changes will not end, and neither does the addiction. Often, the enabler considers himself or herself the reason for the addition of the loved one. So an enabler gives him precious time and money. All these behaviors are actually a barrier to recovery.
Are You an Enabler?
A person does not become an enabler by his choice. Ask yourself. Will, you ever allow or want your loved one to do something that is wrong, and he should not be doing? It is evident that you will always ask a drug addict to undergo proper treatment, but what happens is that he just does not listen to you and keeps on doing drugs. You often set some boundaries and limits and tell them never to cross and violate those boundaries, but still, their desire forces them to cross those limits.
An enabler expects some changes in their behaviour, but he or she is faced with disappointment every time.
It sometimes happens that you decide you will not be paying any money to the addict from now on just for his own well-being. But to satisfy his need, he steals it from you. He abuses you and also attacks you for getting what he wants. He may also get involved in something more illegal just to get what his body wants. So you are forced to give him the money. All those actions from your side that are specifically intended to do well for him make you an enabler, actually.
Being an enabler does not make you the wrong person. You are helping the person just because you love him and want to see him happy. Imagine giving a leaking oxygen cylinder to a diver without knowing it. The cylinder will do well for some time, but as the depth will increase, the diver will realize that he has made a big conspicuous mistake, and you will ultimately be deemed as the one responsible for whatever happened with the poor diver. This is because you could have asked some professional to check whether the cylinder is good or not.
The same goes for a drug addict. An enabler wants to help him but is unaware of how he could be in the best possible way.
Many think that addiction, once developed, stays forever. So ultimately, they start thinking that not helping such a person will eventually lead him to death. Fearing the end, they begin helping him in a way they should not be.
The only way you can help him is by subjecting him to an intensive drug rehabilitation program. In the drug rehab program related to an enabler, the drugs are given after longer intervals, and behaviours resulting from such actions are controlled. This is the only thing that can give your loved one a chance of survival a chance of getting out of the fatal addiction alive. You must realize that what you are doing for your loved ones is enabling and not helping, and this help in the wrong direction will only spoil the case.
We stand by you in your struggle against drugs. Call now for assistance in the treatment of your loved ones. You will find us whenever and wherever you will need. We will identify for you who is playing the role of an enabler for your beloved one.
Ben Lesser is one of the most sought-after experts in health, fitness and medicine. His articles impress with unique research work as well as field-tested skills. We are honored to have Ben writing exclusively for Dualdiagnosis.org.